A Date with the Dentist

If you know me you know that I have crap teeth. No matter how many times I brush my teeth a day, they still fall apart. This is one embarrassing problem that I have. In fact it is more of a nuisance to me then what my actual disability is! I can forget about the fact that I have Cerebal Palsy, but I can never forget about how crap my teeth are. I have had 4 teeth pulled and I am only 27 for crying out loud!

I really hit a real low point when I was brushing my teeth and a bit of tooth broke off one of my front teeth. I was so upset that I rang my husband from work and got him to come home to look after the children so that I could go to the dentist straight away. Well he came home and we went to the dentist only to be told that there were no spots available today. The earliest they could get me in was the following Thursday. So I had no choice but to wait.

I work in customer service, so my job basically requires me to be constantly talking to customers face to face. So for the next week I was so conscious of my teeth that I tried to talk without showing my teeth and tried not to do the big wide open smile that I normally do. If I caught myself doing it I would either cover my mouth if I could or look down at the scanner.

As the weekend went by and Thursday was fast aproaching, my daughter fell ill and on the Wednesday prior to my dentist appointment. Upon taking her to the doctor he told me that she had to stay home for the rest of the week. Since my husband had taken to much time off already this year due to illness and what-not, I had to not only take time off work, but also cancel my dentist appointment. I had to reschedule it for the following Tuesday. So there was another week of trying not to show my teeth.

Well yesterday (Tuesday) I finally got to my appointment with the dentist. Now my dentist is a lovely woman, but it still doesn't make me feel better about going to the dentist. I hate the pain of the needles, and sometimes (ok most of the time) I am still able to feel it. I said my dentist yesterday that if I could remove my face and give it to you to work on while I sat in the waiting room for you to finish doing your work with my teeth, I would be one happy person. Well I am glad to say that on this occassion the procedure didn't hurt and she was also able to save the tooth to by only having to put a filling in instead of pulling it out. My greatest fear was that she would have to pull it out.

Everything was going dandy and I knew I needed to make another appointment to get the other front tooth fixed up. I also have other teeth that need doing as well, so when I went out to pay she said "Now next time I can do two teeth if you want." I asked her how much todays work was and the total cost was $200something, so I said that I will only do one at a time then. This means more visits, but apparently teeth aren't cheap!

So I felt a little more uplifted when I left the dentist surgery, although my bank balance is now suffering. When I went to pick up my children from daycare yesterday afternoon I told my son what I did that day. He wanted to see the tooth, so I showed him and he said "Did you grow a new tooth?" If only it was that simple!

Friday night with Dr Phil

Last friday night would be one of among many of the most memorable nights of my life. On Friday 7th of August I went and saw Dr Phil when he was in Brisbane during his tour of Australia.

I had won tickets to Dr Phil after entering into a competition with the local radio station that I listen to. To win the competition you had to write in and tell them why you need Dr Phil, or something along those lines. Well boy did I have a story to tell, but not wanting to offend anyone involved, I tried to keep the information to a minimum while trying to get the general idea of the situation.

After writing it and sending it off earlier in the week I hadn't heard any mention of my story on the radio, so I thought "Oh well, I tried." Wanting to go to Dr Phil so bad, but not really being able to afford it, I dug deep into our small pathetic excuse of a savings account and bought two of almost cheapest tickets I could get my hands on. Then come later in the week when I was in such a rush I had the radio on but really wasn't listening to it as I was in such a rush to get out the door that morning and everything was hectic, I hear snippets of my story on the radio. I hear things like 'parents' and 'twelve years' and 'meat in the sandwhich' and I think "Oh that poor girl, I know what she is going through" (because it hasn't registered in my brain that it is my story yet) and then I hear my name and I am like "Oh cool she has the same name as me" and then I pause and go "Oh hang on! Oh holy s***! That is my story." At this point I was still unaware that I had won tickets to Dr Phil because I thought that the person that got selected out of everyone that they had read out at the end of the week was the only one to get a ticket to see him.

Anyway a few weeks later I get an email from the radio station asking for my details so that they can notify my of when my Dr Phil tickets come in. I was excited but also sceptical, so I wasn't getting rid of my tickets that I had bought until I got actually got the tickets in my hand. A week before the actual show I get another email saying that the tickets are ready to be picked up, so I quickly race over to the radio station before I had to go to work to get my tickets that I had won.

It wasn't the meet and greet tickets that were up for grabs, but they were way better tickets then the ones that I bought so I set out to sell the other ones. If money hadn't of been as tight as it is at the moment I would have just given them away. I put on my facebook status that I was selling the tickets for what I paif for them which was $89 each. My sister then went and ruined it by commenting on my status by saying "Tickettek was flogging them off for $70 each the other day." I went back to the internet and checked the ticket prices and she was referring to the tickets that were the last reserve. I had gotten the second last reserve tickets. But too late, the damage had already been done by what she said, so I was unable to sell them. This really pissed me off because it seems like my sister is out to make my life hell even though she has everything such as a house and trips overseas every few months when we can't even afford to go up the coast for a night and definitely can't afford to put a permant roof over our children's head.

So eventually I gave them away to one of my friends. She brought her sister with her and they enjoyed it. It was a fantastic night and I couldn't stop laughing at all the funny stories that Dr Phil shared with us. Not only that I took alot of valuable information away from the night. It was completely different from his show on television.

If I ever make it to America for a holiday (one of my dreams is to take my children over for a White Christmas as we spend our Christmas's in 40 degree heat) I would love to go to be in the audience for a taping of one of his shows, not to mention Oprah's as well, but if I never get to do that at least I went and saw Dr Phil in Australia.

Wednesday 5th of August 2009

I woke up this morning ready to brace the day. Shortly after I woke up though I got a phone call that left me very upset and angry. I was still feeling this way when I was dropping my husband off at the train station and on my way to drop the kids off at daycare, so I vowed to take the dog for a walk when I got home before I went to work to see if I could lift my mood.
Well I never got to take the dog for a walk because my little girl was sick and needed to go to the Doctor. So I made an appointment for her thinking that it wasn't much and that I would be able to drop her off at daycare afterwards and then go on to work. Well the doctor had other plans! He told me that she had a virus and needed to be kept at home from kindy for the rest of the week, so consequently I had to go into work and tell them that I couldn't do my shift today and my shift tomorrow.
I love my Thursday shift as well for two reasons. One is because it starts at eight in the morning, which even though it is hectic in the morning getting everyone ready and out the door, I love working early. The second reason is because every Thursday there is a guy that comes in with his disabled sister around about lunchtime.
This is where I realise that there are some good people still in this world. Every Thursday he has off work, so he takes his sister Ten Pin Bowling then he brings her shopping. Even though I can't understand what she says, I always make a point of talking to her and facing her when I ask her how she did at bowling that morning, even though I have to get her brother to translate what she is trying to say to me.
It is little things like that which are important to me to be able to see and hear about because I know how I have been treated by people that are supposed to love you no matter what is wrong with you. I know what it is like to have someone that is embarrassed to have to be related to someone who is disabled, and know that if they had a choice they wouldn't have anything to do with you.

Meggsie's Story

Cerebal Palsy

Born on the 31st December 1981, I was the second child of three children. I was born a healthy normal baby in Brisbane, Australia. It wasn't until I was nine months old when I suffered an aneurysm that my life started to change dramatically.
Living in far north queensland, I was flown down to Cairns Base Hospital with my life hanging in the balance to undergo a craimeotemy. Not expected to live or if I did, to be a vegetable, I was put into an induced coma. This is as much as I know about my accident. Apparently three quarters of the right side of my brain doesn't work.
Over the course of my life, due to my father getting transferred all the time, we lived all around Queensland. I went to 'normal' school from grade one to twelve just like my older sister and younger brother.
Besides having to wear a Caliper and then later a plastic brace thing that I wore in my normal shoe, and the fact of being a bit slower then my classmates I did fine. Most peers from the various schools I attended accepted me for me and I have managed to make lasting friendshilps from most of them. I even went to Boarding School by myself after a nasty experience attending the local state school in Mareeba were my parents were at the time. So off I went to St. Patrick's College in Townsville until my father got transferred down to Brisbane (his last big move), where I ended up at Lourdes Hill College where my sister was already going to school.
It wasn't until I finished year twelve that I was really forced to notice the fact that I had a disability. This is where I found out what 'discrimination' really meant, and where I start to feel like an outcast.
Going through years eleven and twelve, I discovered my passion was caring for children and set out to follow a career in childcare. I got accepted into University to study, but unfortunately I was unable to take up the place as I didn't have the support and guidance I needed as the University I got accepted into was in another town a short distance away. Sadly kissing goodbye my chosen career I had a week to decide what I was going to do instead.
At this point I had struck up a 'train association friendship with a cute boy that I used to catch the train home from school with. After finding out what and where he was studying after year twelve, I changed my path and got it in my head that I wanted to be a social worker so I went on to study a Diploma of Community Services at Tafe.
After a year of sticking it out, I decided that Social Work wasn't for me, so I never went on to complete the course. I was also forced to give up the part time job that I had had since I was fifteen years old.
A blow to my self-esteem I reluctantly went on a Disability Support Pension. Not liking the idea of sitting on my butt day in and day out while people paid for me to eat, I enrolled in a Certificate II in Business (Office Administration) with Tafe. After completing that I then went on to do a traineeship in Certificate III in Business with a transport company. Unfortunately this was only a traineeship position, so once I had gained my Certificate there was no ongoing employment for me, which left me unemployed.
As I tried to look for work in the administration field, I sunk into a depression. By this time I was living by myself in a one bedroom unit, which wasn't helping my welbeing. It wasn't until my boyfriend (now my husband) moved in with me months later, that I started to pick up a little bit, although I was still unemployed. Even though I was unemployed for some time I refused to go back on the Disability Support Pension because I knew that I was capable to work fulltime.
We moved into a house and bought a dog from my friend who breeds Staffys. Because I was under the assumption that I would never be able to have children (after claiming in high school that I wanted 20) I brought up the dog as a substitute child. Til this day he still expects to get his 'cuddle' when my husband sits down in the evening after he comes home from work. We still laugh about one instance where my mother in law came to stay for a few days. My son was a toddler at the time and my mother in law walked into the house and called "Where is Grandma's boy?" and the dog came running out of nowhere thinking that she meant him.
After countless months of looking for employment I fell pregnant with my first child, which halted my job hunting expedition. My husband and I were married when I was four months pregnant in the cheapest wedding that we could come up with because money was tight as I hadn't been working for sometime. Even though it wasn't my ideal wedding, we had a nice ceremony in the front yard of my father's house.
After my son was born I decided that I was going to start living the way that I wanted to and not living the way that other people wanted me to live (because I was disabled). Even though money was tight, I started driving lessons, determined to get my drivers licence. I was 37 weeks pregnant with my second child when I finally gained my drivers licence.
When my daughter was still a baby I started the job searching again, although this time I was getting quite desperate instead of looking for work in the administration field, I would apply for less paying positions, and finally landed a job as a dinning room assistant in a fast food outlet. Even though I was grateful that I was employed again, I felt like I was only good enough to clean tables and put the rubbish out.
After a year I knew that being in the job wasn't doing me any good, I was lucky enough to land a job as a checkout operator at a major supermarket which I am now currently employed.
Even after ten years I haven't been able to forget about my dream to work in Childcare, so at the begining of the year with my husband's encouragement I enrolled in the Certificate in Childrens Services with Open Learning Tafe which enables me to study at home around work and raising my children.
Even though I have passed the subjects that I have completed at the moment, I still have doubts that I am doing the right thing as the comments that I got years back still stay with me to this day. It hurts me that when I announce that I have passed yet another subject, only my friends and husband and my inlaws congratulate me on what I have just achieved.
In the event of telling my story, I hope that I encourage people to not look upon people that have a disability as stupid, spastic or retarded, but look at them as a person. Don't look at their disability, but their ability.